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I don't have the energy, I don't get any feelings from her, I don't care if she is naked, I don't really see her like that. I've been married 45 years to her and we have a decent close relationship. I never used condoms, much like Russian Roulette I went bareback every time. I don't really know how many times I came home late at night and had sex with her after having had sex with a random boy. I wasn't about to tell her that I was picking up young men in the bar area in town. For many years she thought I had a girlfriend, I never gave her reason to think otherwise. She wanted a home and that's what she had. She got pregnant easily and then again a couple of years later. I tried oral sex with her but I really had to build up my will to go down on her. Having sex was easy, it's not hard to do. I met a girl in my senior year and she was intent on getting married and I went along. That was the last relationship of that kind that I had. We had our time together but then he shut me out. I wanted to please him so bad, to show him I was happy to be with him, to make love to his penis, to let him make love tome and to feel his penis penetrate deep into me. That moment when he was on my back and his penis penetrated me and I felt his breath on my neck and he thrust in over and over again, that moment was when I grew up. It was exotic, erotic, the best single night of my life. He wanted more and more happened and I lost my virginity with him.
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I kissed another penis there, of a serviceman. I joined the Navy and spent the next six years there. I grew up in a very conservative house, one of several siblings, and life was tough and we were pushed out the door as soon as we turned 18. It's a memory that has stayed with me all my life. My earliest amorous recollections as a teenager were about kissing a boy at school.